Overcome Fear of Making Wrong Decisions—Introducing “Discernment”
You make decisions all day long—some of them conscious and many of them not. I use the word discernment to identify something that has been chosen with your highest consciousness which is Awareness. This could follow a formal CPM, but even if not, it is with full awareness of why you are making the decision. Discernment means you have a solid level of self-awareness including any patterns of being motivated by fear, shortcuts or other lower-consciousness stimuli, and choose to engage your highest consciousness in the decision-making process. This does not mean that you pull your car over and sit in the lotus position for fifteen minutes before selecting a restaurant for dinner, or making everyday decisions. However, you do pause when unsure or overwhelmed or overreacting, invite a Higher Power of your understanding into your decision, and then proceed. It might take as little as five seconds. It means each time there is a choice to make, you re-tap into you Awareness as if to say, “God, I want you in all my decisions. Please guide me toward the next right action in my life.”
Then, trust the process and surrender to whatever that experience turns out to be.
When you live your life with Awareness, it eliminates the possibility of regret, self-judgment, or self-pity after a decision because you know you were operating from your highest consciousness during the decision process. It was your very best at the moment of choice. In more significant events such as your relationships, sex, finances, and your work, the common denominator is the same. You make your choices from the consciousness in you that is operating at the highest level—Awareness. With discernment, your authentic desires separate and reveal themselves from any thoughts with their origins in antiquated, false or conditioned belief systems from everywhere including pop culture and the news.
Discernment vs. Cultural Conditioning
If a woman is raised in a culture where her marriage is arranged in childhood, and later she connects with Awareness, she knows the arranged marriage is only a tradition her family prefers she follow. However, she also uses discernment to agree and participate or not. Even if it would disappoint others, her thoughts and discernment at the level of Awareness guide her decision making and behavior. She uses the CPM process just as you can. If that guidance suggests she get married as her family planned, then she will. If that guidance suggests something else, she follows that alternate direction.
Perhaps a more relevant example to most reading this article is to look at why you believe what you do about marriage. Some of the unconscious motivations I regularly hear from people who tap into Awareness after getting married are: 1) I thought I needed to be chosen as a spouse to feel valuable, secure and fit in socially, 2) What I really desired was to be a parent and getting married was the strategy I used, and 3) Marriage was my strategy to not be alone. To be clear, this is not an argument to not get married. These are honest comments about why people got married as seen from hindsight. As you build your life with Awareness, it does not mean that you no longer decide to create a family or do any of the normal things people do. The difference is that you do what you do, with an understanding of how your “normal” consciousness has been conditioned, and that is probably different from your Awareness-consciousness, or your true desires. Over time, you separate the old thoughts from the new, and only behave into your authentic desires.
Discernment is my suggested process for all your decisions:
Nutrition & Wellness: When you access your highest consciousness, often your body will tell you exactly what it needs
Work: Using CPM, should you stay at your high-paying and extremely stressful job for a while or is it time to leave? Should you start your own business? What’s next?
Everything else: What inspires me? What do I want to learn? What do I want to experience? Who do I want to connect with?
For coaching related to your partnership, communication, or the development of your spiritual practice , click here to send me an email. Let’s talk.